A letter to R….
It’s midday and I’m sitting at the beautiful garden of the Austrian Hospice in the midst of the Muslim quarter of Jerusalem’s old city. It used to be a hospice that belonged to the Austrian government but currently it’s a guest house notorious for an amazing roof top view of the old city and for serving the best apple strudel in the middle -east. I’m not hungry though….
A minute ago a hundred bells of a hundreds Churches were singing and hundreds Muslim Mu’asins were calling for prayer. Thousands of men made their way to the Al Aqsa mosque for the midday prayer. Hundreds of Israeli soldiers and policemen wonder the streets fully armed. This is an ordinary day in what I call the religious disni-land of the world.
Deep sadness overwhelms me. This sadness is something I’m familiar with when it comes to the old city of Jerusalem. I guess it’s because I’m extremely sensitive to collective consciousness and I guess it’s the accumulation of thousands of years of sufferings on this very earth I walk on today.
So I sit here, breaking my day touring the old city, contemplating how next week at exactly the same time I’ll be in Oxford and that next Tuesday if all goes well I’ll be meeting you somewhere in London. I can’t help thinking about these huge jumps between realities and I know you experience them yourself these days moving between Mumbai to NYC to London.
Truth to be said I’m happy to leave here. I mean, it was wonderful to be here. Good to remember I have family that misses me, friends who love me, colleagues who respect me and a spiritual community who believes I am ripe to share with others. Over the past ten days I was encouraged to facilitate meditation in Israel, was offered to take part in new and creative mindfulness initiatives, offered two professional positions and was repeatedly told how wonderful it would have been to have me back. In the mean time in London, I wasn’t being shortlisted for any of the “grown up” jobs I applied for, nor was I being shortlisted for the temporary unprofessional positions I was trying to get to sustain myself in the mean time. I also still don’t have a permanent home in London or people I can call intimate friends. On paper Israel is a perfect place for me but as tempting and easy as it would have and could have been living here, I am happy to return to the nothingness that awaits for me in London. It doesn’t make sense, I know.
I’ll end now and continue being a tourist in my city. It’s actually the best way to be here. I wish you happy – fun – joyful and juicy days in NYC, the most exhilarating city I’ve ever been to. I also wish you a safe flight back to London and easy landing. Those shifts between continents and realities aren’t easy on the body or the soul so please take extra care of yourself. If you can, take some achinecia and pro-biotics to support the body through those transitions and to keep you more balanced once you land in London.
I look forward to seeing you next week in green cold London.
looking forward to your next mail